


Parchment and Vanilla

by BaileyLovesToWrite



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Background Relationships, Emotionless Harry, Fluff, Fluffy Ending, M/M, Not Canon Compliant - Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Post-Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, little to no Drarry angst because I hate when the boys fight sorry
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-03
Updated: 2019-07-03
Packaged: 2020-06-03 08:06:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,316
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19459855
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BaileyLovesToWrite/pseuds/BaileyLovesToWrite
Summary: Harry suffers through the after-effects of dying at Voldemort's hand. As he goes back for a delayed Eighth Year, he finds unexpected allies and new friends, including an electric Draco Malfoy.





	Parchment and Vanilla

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, all! I’m a long-time reader, first time writer. I have read Drarry fics for years, and I’ve read a lot of them, so I want to say up front that this story will probably contain bits of inspiration from many other pieces. Any reference to other stories is unintentional, and I just hope that this adds to the existing pool of fiction, as well as inspiring other writers. Please contact me if there are any strong resemblances to an existing story; they ARE unintentional, but I am more than happy to give credit where it is due!
> 
> This chapter's a bit funky, established Ginny/Harry relationship and angst. I assume you're all here for Drarry, and it WILL come. I wanted to stay true to the heart of the books by retaining much of the plot and starting him out with Ginny, but I honestly found Harry's choices and outcome post-war to be unrealistic. He died, and it felt too convenient that he would be unaffected by that. I also admittedly didn't like that he ended up with Ginny, as he had to change so much as a person during the war. It feels right to pair him up with someone who also went through the extremes and the true horror of war - even if Draco was on the other side of it. 
> 
> I decided to go with shorter chapters, but a frequent upload schedule, so hopefully I will update very soon.

Parchment and Vanilla

-

Ginny walked up behind him and wrapped her arms around his waist as he made the morning coffee. Her arms overlapped nearly all the way around his torso, and she rested her chin on his shoulder. "What about you, Harry?" Ginny's voice was soft, but strained. "Why don't you let me return the favor?"

He'd tried, really tried. He did all the things Ginny had begged him to the summer before Seventh Year. He followed the paths he knew she liked with his fingers and his mouth, he catalogued the times her breath hitched and repeated those motions until she came. But, by some logic he couldn't understand, she wasn't satisfied.

She had climbed on top of him, swinging her leg smoothly over his and flashing him a wicked grin. She pressed her perky breasts to his chest, ran her nails down the nape of his neck to his back, and whispered her fantasies into his ear. She had reached down, only to find him small and soft. Her choked disbelief had only made Harry remove her more quickly, and he'd taken his quick escape down to the kitchen.

"I'm fine, Gin," Harry found himself protesting for the tenth time this week. "I got to make you feel good. I'm good."

"But Harry-"

"Gin, it's okay. I just don't...want that. I don't think I can."

Ginny spun him around and gaped at him. He could see her eyes watering, and he hurried to backtrack.

"No, Gin, it's okay! It's not you. It just," he paused, "it doesn't work."

"Harry," she started, her voice cracking. He winced and avoided her eyes as she continued. "Harry, it's been almost three months since the war ended. I need you, I need to feel you again.

I think you should see someone. It doesn't have to be like this, there has to be an answer. A treatment. I know I'll have to wait, but," she tensed her shoulders and looked up at him, familiar heated determination in her eyes. "I can wait. You'll be back to normal before you know it."

Normal. So Ginny thought he was abnormal. He shouldn't be surprised; the Dursleys had seen it in him, even as a baby. "Okay Gin. I'll call St Mungo's today. Get the first appointment I can."

"Thank you, Harry." Her smile was so wide and earnest. He avoided looking at it as he drank his coffee and she ate her breakfast, chattering away. He stared into his finished cup as she left the room, swirling the small amount of liquid and watching it slosh over the painted china, covering and revealing cracks in the glaze.

He jumped out of his seat, knocking the chair over as she came back into the room.

"Hey, hey, it's okay. You alright?"

He shook his head and ran a hand through his hair, forcing a light laugh. "Yeah, sorry, I… What did you come back for?”

“I have to leave, love. Meeting with Louise in 20 to discuss plays. Are you sure you’re okay?”

“Yeah, ‘course I am, Gin. Must have spaced out for a minute there.” He tried to smile at her as she walked over. “I’ll see you for dinner. Wipe the floor with ‘em.” He grasped her upper arms and kissed her cheek softly.

She grinned and kissed him, though he could see the worry in her eyes. “I’ll hand their arses to them, don’t you worry. Get us a nice curry, will you, love?”

Ginny grabbed her wand off the counter and swirled out of the kitchen with a pop. Harry walked over to the sink and splashed a bit of water on his face before heading over to the floo. He threw a pinch of powder in, and clearly stated “St Mungo’s, Healer Pomfrey’s office.”

\---

Poppy's face emerged from the green flames with a look of concern, but she broke out in a wrinkled, beaming smile when she saw him. "Mr. Potter! What a pleasure to see you again. Forgive me, there are so few keyed into the wards that I never expect a call. What can I do you for?"

"It's Harry, Poppy, how many times do I have to tell you?"

"Yes, yes. Well, tell me, what brings you to my office this morning, Harry?"

He swallowed hard, knowing how vulnerable he had to be. Did he really want Madame Pomfrey, who nursed him since he was eleven, knowing the intimate details of his sex life? Harry nodded, straightened his shoulders, and looked up at her. If not Poppy, then who? "Ginny has noticed that I have been... unsatisfactory in the bedroom."

She raised an eyebrow, bringing him instantly back to his days in the infirmary, feeding her a prepared explanation of his injuries. He waited for her to respond, but she just tilted her head as if waiting for more. 

Harry flushed even as he fought to keep his expression steady. "Er, well, that is to say... I don't have any, er, urges. I don't," he paused, "I don't want to have sex with her. I don't think about it. I don't dream about it. I don't respond to Gin when she touches me."

Poppy's warm voice responded quickly this time. "I commend you for your bravery, Mr. Potter. Thank you for trusting me with this. 

It would bring me great happiness to see your successful treatment. However, I regret to say that I am not entirely qualified. I would like you to see a friend and colleague, Healer Bonham. She's meant to be enjoying retirement, but she retains a select few private clients. You will need to trust me, but Alice is at the apex of our field; her knowledge is unmatched. She offers full discretion under magical oath. Will you allow me to refer you?"

Thoughts flitted through Harry’s head. Healer Bonham was an unknown, but Poppy trusted her. She knew more about magical adolescents than most, if not all healers. She swore an oath of secrecy. “Alright, Poppy. I think that would be just fine.”

Poppy beamed at him, her eyes twinkling. “Very good, Mr. Potter. I’ll send my receptionist through in just a mo.”

“It’s Harry!” he shouted after her retreating figure.

He squatted stiffly in front of the hearth. He was rooted to the spot, only moving to breathe for what felt like ten minutes, but must have been two or three. He shifted from one foot to the other, and flexed his fingers. He looked down at his sallow brown hands, absentmindedly fingering a hangnail. He cleared his throat, then again, and coughed. He leaned down to look into the flames of the open floo, but they flickered in the same pattern again and again, no sign of change.

Harry turned towards the counter, intent on the kettle, when the floo flared behind him. He spun around on the spot, sputtering out an apology as a young man’s face peered through the flames.

“Mr. Potter, I apologize for the wait. Healer Bonham can see you at 14:00 today, if that is acceptable.”

Harry was caught off guard. Today? Ginny said it would take weeks to be seen. But she was mad at him and sounded angry with the wait, so the sooner the better. “Yes,” he replied quickly, realizing he had been staring into the distance. “Yes, thank you. That would be great.”

The receptionist smiled at him in that same doting, nearly reverent way he had gotten far too accustomed to. “We will see you then, Mr. Potter. If there is anything else I-“

He cut the man off with a thin returning smile, though he feared it looked more like a sneer. He blurted out a quick “Thank you, see you then,” and shut the floo connection. He took a deep breath and leaned his hand against the wall, looking around the room.


End file.
